San-scarred for life

The room is dimly lit. And eerily quiet.

The men and women seated around the table look at each other nervously. Finally, one of them summons up the courage to speak –

“I understand that, sir. But one of us has to make a nonsensical statement on the subject, sir.”

The man listens on, his eyes fixed on the speaker like a leopard’s. ‘Let the doctor do it.’

‘But, sir…’ the man injects, ‘he is a doctor. He ran the country’s…’

‘I know. But one of us has to make the statement. Let it be him. This meeting is dismissed.’

 

*

 

And just like that, another minister goes on to make an idiotic statement about the nation and Indian culture. This time, it was about sex education.

The entire episode has baffled me. That a reputed doctor would say that the nation needs to promote Indian values, and not condoms, to check AIDS. Almost takes one back to the surreal time when Sushma Swaraj ordered Doordarshan newsreaders not to wear translucent blouses while reading out news. Doordarshan news – even though market surveys have revealed that the primary target audience for the channel are lizards and moths.

To get a better picture of the issue, I looked up some Sex Education books that are used by the government, to see if children of today are being encouraged to take part in inter-school orgies and sleep with cattle.

This is what I found. The books talk of sensitization, give brief descriptions of pregnancy, STDs, and the human anatomy. What is so offensive about this, Dr. Harshavardhan?

*

Sex education is crucial in our country. A country where we are not culturally in the habit of speaking about it with our parents. Which means the only other source of knowledge on the subject is pornography, a senior at school, or the sleazy man selling Letters to Penthouse at the railways station. I can vouch for this.

Long long before the evil world of websites came into our perverse lives, there was imagination. And along with imagination, there were films.

Back then, conjugation was enacted by a 5 minute song in Ramoji Film City, followed by a close-up shot of a baby poster in the room. Then, there were the raunchy ones where Raveena Tandon would gyrate in a yellow saree, giving birth to a million sinful thoughts.

Or there would be the pseudo-conjugation scenes were actors would rub noses, breathe into each other’s cheeks, and if you were Balakrishna – do Suryanamaskar on the heroine’s navel.

Which created a disturbingly confusing image in my mind.

What really happens there? I mean, I understand there’s some touching and rubbing involved, but what do I do if there’s no song playing in the background? And what if it doesn’t rain?

This magical phase of endless possibilities was brutally shattered one night in Sixth Standard. It happened one night as we lay awake in bed, listening to a senior tell us of the amazing things he had learnt.

“The man puts his No.1 Place in the woman’s No.1 Place,” he said.

 

Long after he had gone back to his bed, we discussed and critiqued the outlandish theory that had been suggested to us a few hours ago.

‘Do you think it is possible?’

‘No, I think he’s gassing.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah. Children happen because men tie Mangalsutra around the woman’s neck.’

I thought of it for a while. It made perfect sense. But…‘What about Muslims?’

‘They have that thing no? Tabeez? You have not seen Azharuddin, aa?’

‘And what about Christians?’

‘They have Cross, na?’

‘Oh yeah…but how do you know all this?’

‘I asked my mother, she told me.’

 

That was how I learnt about the birds and the bees for the first time. Later on, when pornography came into my life, I thought it was natural to smack the girl’s ass while having sex. Till I got a good dressing down and realised none of that was true. It was abnormal.

I spent a few years worrying about getting action, and then getting more action, unsatisfied till I was putting up Vivid Entertainment style performances. It was a confused, reckless phase brimming with anxiety, doubts, and fears.

All because nobody spoke to me. Nobody explained the basics to me. For more proof, check out the questions in the sex column in a newspaper in India.

 

Courtesy: http://imgur.com/gallery/aUaTsAH

 

*

For a community like ours, sex education is important. Especially when put in the context of the increasing crimes against women. In a country where teenage boys strip open a girl’s clothes, rape her, and slam a rod into her vagina. Do we really have any culture to speak of?

Look into the newspaper, and you will find a report a day, of youth molesting, abusing, and raping women. Of recording the act and putting it up on the internet. What are we trying to protect again?

Culture is not a standard protocol followed in ancient texts. How we do things is our culture. We eat with our hands, that’s our culture. We fold our hands when greeting elders, that’s our culture. We rape women, tear their clothes off, dump them from buses, that’s our culture.

With the onset of internet, smartphones, and data connectivity, the youth of the country run a risk of acquiring knowledge for abnormal ways like the internet. Permanently warping ideas of sex and sexuality in their minds.

Sex education, if anything, creates a sensitivity among students. Towards the other gender, towards the act of having sex. It normalizes the act, ridding a thousand minds of thousand worries. How on earth is it against Indian culture?

And this is from a reputed doctor, the Health minister of the country?

May be true Indian culture is politicians making stupid statements. May be that’s really our culture.

 

*

And as icing to the cake, Dr. Harshvardhan suggests that we use Indian values to counter AIDS. Now there are a few ways this could be done.

1. When the body notices the HIV virus approaching the body, the White Blood Cells get together to organize a havan. With the havan, the body acquires a high temperature, and HIV goes back to its hive.
2. When the Ova notice Spermjis swimming towards them eagerly, they can fold their hands, call the sperm ‘bhaiyya’, and request them not to enter. Pregnancies could be averted.
3. One chants Ram, Ram, Ram continuously. On a loop, it sounds like Mara, Mara, Mara. This magical chant kills all the rakshasha HIV viruses in the body.
4. This is so absurd, I can’t even think of a fourth point.

 

The sad part is, everytime there is a need to push a certain agenda, Indian culture is brought up. It is an impenetrable blanket that is supposed to be accepted without protest or objection. You know who else does that, dear BJP? The Taliban. Yes, that organization that you love to hate.

They issue orders, ask people to follow Neanderthal rules, enforcing it in the name of culture and values. This is just a civilized, English speaking version of them, if things go on like this.

*

 

Which is my main problem with the BJP.

Whilst it talks of development and progress, its ideals are stuck in the 19^th century.

Development is not restricted to swanky roads, billions in revenue, and high-rise buildings. Even Dubai has those.

Development is also a maturity in handling issues. Development is a society that learns to peacefully adapt to new challenges, shrugging off traditional ideas and dogmas. Development is a free, mature society that is willing to confront its issues, to speak of them without sweeping them under the carpet.

Development is ensuring an entire generation of youth do not grow up believing that masturbation makes palms hairy. And that girls like it when you pull their hair, spread their legs, and spank their ass.

What is the kind of development you are looking for?